BURBANK, CA—The Matrix was a groundbreaking science fiction film with a lot to say about dystopian governments, the dangers of technology, and the need to rebel against authoritarian systems.
So, of course, the movie's message is very out of step with American culture in 2021. To that end, the upcoming entry in the franchise, The Matrix Resurrections, will have Neo just telling all the humans to stay home and stay safe in their pods.
"Alright, listen up, everybody," Neo says after exiting the Matrix. "The important thing here is your health and safety. We're all just going to stay home and stay safe in these nice, comfortable pods. It's much less dangerous than being free in the real world."
"@#$% your freedoms!" he then shouts at some humans waking up from the Matrix. "Do you want grandma to die?!" He immediately alerts the machines in charge of making sure humanity is safe, and the humans are mercifully killed.
Neo then turns over the members of the human resistance to the authorities for endangering everyone's health and is praised as a hero.
Kyle and Ethan talk to Dave Rubin about identifying as a conservative, California, and Christianity. Dave has written a new book titled Don’t Burn This Book available wherever you find books
The 🐝 Podcast is also available on all podcast platforms.
Barron Tries To Blend In On Campus By Putting His Knees In His Shoes And Walking Around Like A Normal-Height Person
"I just want to be treated like any other 7-foot son of a billionaire president," said Barron to reporters. "Everywhere I go, I hear: 'Who is that giant person?' or 'Hey look! It's the heir to the throne of the American Empire, may he live forever!' or 'REEEEEEEEE!' It's really exhausting."
Healthy Vegan Food Carefully Constructed In Laboratory Using 957 Chemicals
"You have got to get rid of all the bad stuff, like the meat and the animal products," said lab technician Luka Ranier, pouring a beaker of methylphenylketone into a bubbling broth of 2,2-dimethylpropyl benzoyletate as part of the standard process of making a meatless burger. "We manage to get our job done here with just 957 simple compounds that have been optimized for human health and consumption."
Congress Warns Trump's Attempts To End War In Ukraine Could Result In End Of War In Ukraine
"If Trump ends the war in Ukraine, then the war in Ukraine will stop," warned House Minority Leader Hakeem Jeffries. "Trump is clearly not thinking about all the terrible things that will happen to us if the war in Ukraine ends."
