NEW YORK CITY, PANEM—Smiling migrant children poured out of buses at the entrance to the Met Gala, grateful to be free of overcrowded border detention facilities, and excited to experience the freedom in America promised by President Joseph Coriolanus Biden.
They were quickly corralled into a ballroom filled with members of the elite class who were dressed in beautiful draperies and gorgeous patio furniture covers, and who gazed upon the children with a hunger that looked sort of different than regular hunger.
Holding a diamond-encrusted, baby penguin down feather handkerchief up to her face, elite rich person Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez gasped in horror after realizing there was no fence between the possibly unvaccinated children and her elegant white gown with a red “Save The Migrant Children” message scrawled down its back. In a panic, she ran to the safety of her Tesla.
Calming other uncomfortable celebrities and wealthy elites, Oprah Winfrey, ruling class representative and close friend to Harvey Weinstein, welcomed the migrant children to the gala and thanked them for volunteering as tribute for the first annual Hunger Games Tournament. Turning to her fellow elites, Oprah began pointing and shouting, “You get a tribute! You get a tribute!”
The migrant children were then led to preparation rooms to be safely vaccinated before fighting to the death under the entertained gaze of the gracious and noble Hollywood elites.
Kyle and Ethan talk to Dave Rubin about identifying as a conservative, California, and Christianity. Dave has written a new book titled Don’t Burn This Book available wherever you find books
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Barron Tries To Blend In On Campus By Putting His Knees In His Shoes And Walking Around Like A Normal-Height Person
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