KENOSHA, WI—In what many are calling a tragic setback for social justice, local Antifa militants have been forced to postpone their planned riot in Kenosha. This comes after several supply chain disruptions, which have delayed shipments of bricks.
"We'll have to reschedule our violent destruction of this city," said local Antifa captain Xindo Camdenleigh. "Our shipments of bricks, bike locks, bear spray, billy clubs, baseball bats, Goldfish crackers, and fruit snacks are still sitting on a cargo ship outside of the L.A. Long Beach port."
The crowd erupted in a fit of wails, cries, and shrieks due to hearing the bad news, but also due to the cocktails of medications and drugs that were coursing through their veins.
"This would never happen if it weren't for capitalism!" yelled Camdenleigh. "Burn it down! Burn it all down! I mean—not right now, but on December 8th at 6pm when our shipment arrives."
Local activists are being encouraged to participate in other criminal activity that doesn't require bricks until then.
Kyle and Ethan talk to Dave Rubin about identifying as a conservative, California, and Christianity. Dave has written a new book titled Don’t Burn This Book available wherever you find books
The 🐝 Podcast is also available on all podcast platforms.
UFO Files Reveal Aliens Here And Already Defrauded Minnesota For $20 Billion
"They're here among us," alien specialist Donny Marcus told the press. "I've been studying these beings for years — they're smart, and they're resourceful. It took no time at all for them to defraud Tim Walz's government of billions through Medicare and Medicaid fraud. The government didn't even ask why they needed the money; they just forked it over. The invasion people have been anticipating has been happening right under our noses all along."
Democrat Effort To Retake Congress Once Again Thwarted By Existence Of Laws
"The Democratic Party would be winning in a landslide if it weren't for that confounded Constitution," said House Minority Leader Hakeem Jeffries. "We have so many great ideas on how to win, but people keep saying things like 'Hey, that's illegal' or 'That's literally a crime.' It's becoming disheartening."
Virginia Considering New Measure That Just Makes It Illegal For Republicans To Vote
"This is way easier," said Democratic Governor Abigail Spanberger. "We're tackling the real issue, which is Republicans being allowed to vote at all. There will be no more campaigning, no more counting ballots. That stuff is such a hassle anyway."
