SACRAMENTO, CA—Amid surging cases of a mild cold called Omicron, California is acting decisively to reinstitute the popular mask mandate. Experts say this should effectively flatten the already completely flat, horizontal line of almost zero Omicron deaths.
"We have to flatten the horizontal line, and we have to do it now," said Newsom forcefully. "They say it can't be done, but California never backs down from a challenge! I say we make that line flatter! Who's with me?"
According to sources, the entire crowd groaned, except for 3 surgical mask sales reps in the back, who cheered wildly.
The mandate will require everyone to wear masks indoors, except for the rich and the powerful, who are not in need of such protections. This is because they have plenty of antibody-infused blood which their house servants have gladly volunteered to donate.
Newsom confirmed that masks will continue to be worn until the flat line becomes flatter, or until the human spirit of California citizens is completely crushed, whichever comes first.
Kyle and Ethan talk to Dave Rubin about identifying as a conservative, California, and Christianity. Dave has written a new book titled Don’t Burn This Book available wherever you find books
The 🐝 Podcast is also available on all podcast platforms.
As one of the few sane people in MA - THANK YOU - for that article about MA just now ie the entire state is declared incompetent! I sent you a one-time donation of $25 just for that. I tell them that all the time too. :)
UFO Files Reveal Aliens Here And Already Defrauded Minnesota For $20 Billion
"They're here among us," alien specialist Donny Marcus told the press. "I've been studying these beings for years — they're smart, and they're resourceful. It took no time at all for them to defraud Tim Walz's government of billions through Medicare and Medicaid fraud. The government didn't even ask why they needed the money; they just forked it over. The invasion people have been anticipating has been happening right under our noses all along."
Democrat Effort To Retake Congress Once Again Thwarted By Existence Of Laws
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