WASHINGTON, D.C.—The Biden administration will be providing free crack pipes to crack addicts, but only if they can show valid proof of vaccination against COVID-19.
Jen Psaki shared further details regarding Biden's new proposal during her daily press briefing.
"The president feels, and we agree, that people are going to smoke crack anyway. We might as well give them safe crack so they can hit a sweet high without fear of overdose. We're doing this to save Black lives."
"But only if they're vaccinated."
Polling data shows the African American community has the highest vaccine-hesitancy rate in the country due to fears exacerbated by the Tuskegee experiment and that time the CIA created a crack epidemic to kill off all the Black people. Now the Biden administration is working to restore racial equity by further fueling the epidemic the government got them addicted to in the first place.
"If you won't inject yourself with an experimental vaccine then you can't be trusted to use anything but black tar heroin," said Psaki. "No safe zones for crack cocaine until we're sure you're not going to infect others with a mild disease."
Whoopi Goldberg emerged from her suspension to question why her community was being enabled to slip deeper into a dangerous addiction, but then she was canceled again for being ignorant.
Kyle and Ethan talk to Dave Rubin about identifying as a conservative, California, and Christianity. Dave has written a new book titled Don’t Burn This Book available wherever you find books
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"They're here among us," alien specialist Donny Marcus told the press. "I've been studying these beings for years — they're smart, and they're resourceful. It took no time at all for them to defraud Tim Walz's government of billions through Medicare and Medicaid fraud. The government didn't even ask why they needed the money; they just forked it over. The invasion people have been anticipating has been happening right under our noses all along."
"The Democratic Party would be winning in a landslide if it weren't for that confounded Constitution," said House Minority Leader Hakeem Jeffries. "We have so many great ideas on how to win, but people keep saying things like 'Hey, that's illegal' or 'That's literally a crime.' It's becoming disheartening."
"This is way easier," said Democratic Governor Abigail Spanberger. "We're tackling the real issue, which is Republicans being allowed to vote at all. There will be no more campaigning, no more counting ballots. That stuff is such a hassle anyway."