LOS ANGELES, CA—In a brilliant move showing their intelligence and street smarts, both of which were definitely not acquired in the public school system, L.A.U.S.D. students dressed up as celebrities attending the Super Bowl this morning so they wouldn't have to wear a mask to school. Students donned attire making them appear to be miniature versions of Martha Stewart, Ryan Reynolds, Will Ferrell, and more big-name celebrities, hundreds of whom attended the packed football game yesterday without a mask in sight. "Sorry, teach -- you can't make me wear that," said one girl who now resembled Miley Cyrus. "I'm rich and famous and I'm above your rules." One smart student dressed up as Gavin Newsom himself, so he was allowed to wear no mask, dine indoors, and even given a private lunch party at an exclusive lunch table just for him, while everyone else had to wear masks and sit six feet apart.
There is hope for the future after all!
Kyle and Ethan talk to Dave Rubin about identifying as a conservative, California, and Christianity. Dave has written a new book titled Don’t Burn This Book available wherever you find books
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Barron Tries To Blend In On Campus By Putting His Knees In His Shoes And Walking Around Like A Normal-Height Person
"I just want to be treated like any other 7-foot son of a billionaire president," said Barron to reporters. "Everywhere I go, I hear: 'Who is that giant person?' or 'Hey look! It's the heir to the throne of the American Empire, may he live forever!' or 'REEEEEEEEE!' It's really exhausting."
Healthy Vegan Food Carefully Constructed In Laboratory Using 957 Chemicals
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Congress Warns Trump's Attempts To End War In Ukraine Could Result In End Of War In Ukraine
"If Trump ends the war in Ukraine, then the war in Ukraine will stop," warned House Minority Leader Hakeem Jeffries. "Trump is clearly not thinking about all the terrible things that will happen to us if the war in Ukraine ends."
