BEIJING—Chinese President Xi Jinping has reportedly looked on Prime Minister Justin Trudeau's handling of Canadian protesters with surprise, describing it as "monstrous" and "heavy-handed."
"I'm shocked by Trudeau's horrific mistreatment of his own people," said President Xi Jinping while helping himself to a jar of honey. "He's being very heavy-handed with these protesters. It's shameful!"
Xi, who polices his own people for thought crimes, suggested that Trudeau try a more subtle approach. "I'm constantly throwing people in prison," he said. "But I do so discreetly while silencing anyone who speaks of it."
"Please understand," he continued. "I believe he should throw them all in camps to make shoes for the Americans. But he's openly criticizing them—giving their cause a voice."
"It's a rookie move."
Trudeau, who has referred to people sitting in their trucks as violent protesters sieging the city, has claimed that he only desires to crush his citizens under the jackboot of tyranny, revel in their cries of anguish, and scatter their wasted corpses to the wind.
"I don't see what's so heavy-handed about that," said Trudeau.
Kyle and Ethan talk to Dave Rubin about identifying as a conservative, California, and Christianity. Dave has written a new book titled Don’t Burn This Book available wherever you find books
The 🐝 Podcast is also available on all podcast platforms.
UFO Files Reveal Aliens Here And Already Defrauded Minnesota For $20 Billion
"They're here among us," alien specialist Donny Marcus told the press. "I've been studying these beings for years — they're smart, and they're resourceful. It took no time at all for them to defraud Tim Walz's government of billions through Medicare and Medicaid fraud. The government didn't even ask why they needed the money; they just forked it over. The invasion people have been anticipating has been happening right under our noses all along."
Democrat Effort To Retake Congress Once Again Thwarted By Existence Of Laws
"The Democratic Party would be winning in a landslide if it weren't for that confounded Constitution," said House Minority Leader Hakeem Jeffries. "We have so many great ideas on how to win, but people keep saying things like 'Hey, that's illegal' or 'That's literally a crime.' It's becoming disheartening."
Virginia Considering New Measure That Just Makes It Illegal For Republicans To Vote
"This is way easier," said Democratic Governor Abigail Spanberger. "We're tackling the real issue, which is Republicans being allowed to vote at all. There will be no more campaigning, no more counting ballots. That stuff is such a hassle anyway."
