The Babylon Bee
Fake news you can trust.
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The Babylon Bee@thebabylonbee
March 14, 2022
Sea Creatures Looking Forward To Wearing Discarded Masks For Next Few Million Years
“While the billions of masks being dumped into the Earth’s oceans will prove to be one of the worst ecological disasters in human history, this calamity has been offset by the reassurance that liberals could constantly wear masks in public and private and virtue signal that they were good people.” said the paper’s lead author, Dr. Eugene Daughterson, Ph.D.
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🎙Christianity, Star Wars Prequels, and Staying In California | The Dave Rubin Interview
Kyle and Ethan talk to Dave Rubin about identifying as a conservative, California, and Christianity. Dave has written a new book titled Don’t Burn This Book available wherever you find books
The 🐝 Podcast is also available on all podcast platforms.
00:50:59
FBI Says They Were Just About To Get The School Shooter But They Had To Take Care Of A Few Dangerous Pro-Life Protestors First
"I'm gonna be honest — my bad," Dolon said, shaking his head. "But do keep in mind that we almost had that shooter. We were so close — we just had to catch and imprison a bunch of dangerous pro-life people who were doing horrible, dangerous things like praying outside of abortion clinics. It's really a shame, but we did have to get those guys first. Priorities, am I right? Besides, you don't want a bunch of dangerous pro-life supporters running around or voting or anything like that. Cut us some slack, will you?"
FBI Assures Public The Next Ten Mass Shooters Are Also On Their Radar
"The public can rest easy knowing that we're fully aware of the next several shooters," said FBI Special Agent Owen Gaffney. "We have multiple individuals under close surveillance at this time, and we are confident that each of them will eventually become a mass murderer. The American people can have full confidence in the FBI to keep watching these suspects so we can identify them and notify the public immediately after they do something truly horrific."https://babylonbee.com/news/fbi-assures-public-the-next-ten-mass-shooters-are-also-on-their-radar
