U.S.—A grim new study has found that all two million Americans who took a plane trip yesterday are now dead of COVID. The millions of citizens innocently flying on airplanes, completely safe from the virus because they were wearing masks in a tiny cylinder hurtling through the air with 200 other people, instantly dropped dead as soon as the mask mandate was struck down by a federal judge.
"Ladies and gentlemen, the mask mandate has been lifted. You are free to take off your masks if you choose!" said one elated flight attendant, removing her mask for the first time at work in over two years. Cheers went up from the cabin, but they were quickly subdued as, one by one, every passenger in the cabin dropped dead of COVID. The pilots, flight engineers, first officers, and attendants also instantly dropped dead of COVID. In a scene that looked like it belonged in a Left Behind movie, thousands of planes dropped from the sky as their operators died of the virus.
"I tried to tell them," said Dr. Fauci during a press conference. "I've been trying to warn you all of this for years, and nobody listened. If you all had just paid a little more attention to me, watched one of my hit Disney+ documentaries, and followed the science—err, I mean, followed the me—this all could have been avoided. This is a dark day indeed."
Uber didn't heed the warning of what happened in the skies yesterday and also lifted its own mandate this morning, causing tens of thousands more deaths in just the first few hours of the day.
Sad!
Kyle and Ethan talk to Dave Rubin about identifying as a conservative, California, and Christianity. Dave has written a new book titled Don’t Burn This Book available wherever you find books
The 🐝 Podcast is also available on all podcast platforms.
State and local officials rush to create a catalog of minors to hand over to those on the Epstein client list.
"We want to protect the children" This new bill (Illinois SB 3977) is very similar to the recently passed California bill (and the introduced Colorado bill) and, if passed, would set a deadline of January 1st, 2028 for compliance.
https://legiscan.com/IL/bill/SB3977/2025
Barron Tries To Blend In On Campus By Putting His Knees In His Shoes And Walking Around Like A Normal-Height Person
"I just want to be treated like any other 7-foot son of a billionaire president," said Barron to reporters. "Everywhere I go, I hear: 'Who is that giant person?' or 'Hey look! It's the heir to the throne of the American Empire, may he live forever!' or 'REEEEEEEEE!' It's really exhausting."
Healthy Vegan Food Carefully Constructed In Laboratory Using 957 Chemicals
"You have got to get rid of all the bad stuff, like the meat and the animal products," said lab technician Luka Ranier, pouring a beaker of methylphenylketone into a bubbling broth of 2,2-dimethylpropyl benzoyletate as part of the standard process of making a meatless burger. "We manage to get our job done here with just 957 simple compounds that have been optimized for human health and consumption."
