WASHINGTON, D.C.—Joe Biden has come to the defense of Pepe Le Pew after liberals wanted to cancel him, with the president saying he was "always my favorite character, a real stand-up guy."
Biden strongly condemned attempts to censor the Looney Tunes character, saying he doesn't even understand what the issue with Pepe is.
"The way Pepe pursues women and sniffs them and hugs them -- man, he's the best," Biden said. "I don't know why people are trying to cancel him. Pepe is an upstanding example of how men should treat women. Mmmm, women. I learned a lot from Pepe. Back in my day, the Looney Tunes only came on in black and white. We only got one channel, you know, and mom and dad would make me stand there and hold up two metal spoons to get the channel in. I'd put aluminum foil on my head and stand there and finally, we'd get to see those funny little cartoons."
Pepe Le Pew quickly distanced himself from Biden after the president's statements, saying he doesn't want to be associated with a creepy old man like Joe.
Kyle and Ethan talk to Dave Rubin about identifying as a conservative, California, and Christianity. Dave has written a new book titled Don’t Burn This Book available wherever you find books
The 🐝 Podcast is also available on all podcast platforms.
SAN FRANCISCO—A cashier working the closing shift at a small mom-and-pop store on Sutter St. was left shocked and bewildered when a customer tried to pay for her items.
Store security footage reveals the customer roamed the store calmly while looters plucked most shelves dry. She picked up a few trinkets before heading to the register.
"I wasn't really paying attention," said the cashier, Brian Risico. "We get lots of looters, but I don't think I've ever seen a paying customer. No one taught me how to use the register."
"Then this chick comes up," he continued. "She's– I don't know. Normal? She placed some products on the counter and asked for the damage. I thought she was going to hurt me, but it turned out she wanted to know how much money she should give me."
Risico stared blankly at the woman for a minute before panicking and fleeing in terror. The unnamed customer then placed a twenty on the counter and left. The twenty-dollar bill was promptly stolen.
According to ...
U.S.—As part of a bold new marketing strategy to promote inclusivity and appeal to less than 1% of the population, Mars, Incorporated has introduced a new M&M character who identifies as a Skittle.
"I'm gonna be honest here. We basically are doing this because it's hip and makes us look cool," said Mars, Incorporated CEO Franklin Crunchy. "And that adds to the bottom line. I think we can make a decent fortune by comparing the hardship of real trans people to a wacky cartoon character."
"Trans people deserve to be represented by M&Ms," he continued. "Our Trans-Skittle character will help us break chocolate-covered barriers in your mouth and not in your hands."
The new character, named Quinn, is an M&M that wears an "S" because they haven't had letter reassignment surgery yet. On the inside, Quinn has the same chocolate taste because it isn't able to change anything but its outward appearance.
"We just want to let the trans community know that M&M supports you and wants your money!"...
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