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Biden Suspected Of Contributing To Border Crisis By Hanging Signs Saying 'Free Stuff, Come On In'

EL PASO, TX—Many are starting to call the migrant surge at the southern border a "crisis" as more people continue to arrive and detention centers overflow. It is currently unclear who caused this crisis, but some critics are suggesting it may have something to do with all the "Free Stuff, Come On In" signs Biden has been hanging on the side of the border wall.

"For months now, Joe Biden has been sneaking down here at night, hanging up 'Free Stuff' posters along the border wall," said Amos Gutierrez, an ICE agent on the border. "I'm not saying the border surge is Biden's fault or anything, but the signs may have something to do with it."

Studies show that most migrants are just coming here to work hard and provide for their families, but some have shown an increase in people who are just coming here for free stuff-- likely due to the signs.

"We don't want hard-working, self-reliant people coming into the country," said House Speaker Nancy Pelosi. "We need people who are looking for free stuff so they'll vote for us forever. Did I say that out loud? Good morning! Sunday morning!"

Biden has promised to temporarily take down the "Free Stuff" signs until the media can finish their important work of making the crisis disappear.

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https://babylonbee.com/news/barron-tries-to-blend-in-on-campus-by-putting-his-knees-in-his-shoes-and-walking-around-like-a-normal-height-person

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https://babylonbee.com/news/healthy-vegan-food-carefully-constructed-in-laboratory-using-957-chemicals

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Congress Warns Trump's Attempts To End War In Ukraine Could Result In End Of War In Ukraine

"If Trump ends the war in Ukraine, then the war in Ukraine will stop," warned House Minority Leader Hakeem Jeffries. "Trump is clearly not thinking about all the terrible things that will happen to us if the war in Ukraine ends."

https://babylonbee.com/news/congress-warns-trumps-attempts-to-end-war-in-ukraine-could-result-in-end-of-war-in-ukraine

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