HOUSTON, TX—NASA made a surprise announcement this week: It will cease all missions to the planet Mars. This happened after a number of activists pointed out that Mars completely lacks any early voting, raising the specter that any mission to Mars would support voter suppression.
“We here at NASA are in favor of voting rights,” said NASA director and founder Bob NASA. “And we can’t in good conscience work with a planet that doesn’t embrace those rights.”
The move is expected to devastate the Mars economy, which is currently zero but after exploration and colonization could eventually be more than zero. Mars supporters have pointed out that there is no actual record of any voter suppression (or voting) on Mars, but NASA insists that the important thing is that the planet appears to be for the restriction of voting.
"Appearances are what matter most here," said NASA.
Mars had been controversial as a target for exploration from the onset since it is a red planet. NASA is now instead setting its sights on a blue planet, Uranus, and plans to make all future missions there. Uranus is full of gas.
Kyle and Ethan talk to Dave Rubin about identifying as a conservative, California, and Christianity. Dave has written a new book titled Don’t Burn This Book available wherever you find books
The 🐝 Podcast is also available on all podcast platforms.
State and local officials rush to create a catalog of minors to hand over to those on the Epstein client list.
"We want to protect the children" This new bill (Illinois SB 3977) is very similar to the recently passed California bill (and the introduced Colorado bill) and, if passed, would set a deadline of January 1st, 2028 for compliance.
https://legiscan.com/IL/bill/SB3977/2025
Barron Tries To Blend In On Campus By Putting His Knees In His Shoes And Walking Around Like A Normal-Height Person
"I just want to be treated like any other 7-foot son of a billionaire president," said Barron to reporters. "Everywhere I go, I hear: 'Who is that giant person?' or 'Hey look! It's the heir to the throne of the American Empire, may he live forever!' or 'REEEEEEEEE!' It's really exhausting."
Healthy Vegan Food Carefully Constructed In Laboratory Using 957 Chemicals
"You have got to get rid of all the bad stuff, like the meat and the animal products," said lab technician Luka Ranier, pouring a beaker of methylphenylketone into a bubbling broth of 2,2-dimethylpropyl benzoyletate as part of the standard process of making a meatless burger. "We manage to get our job done here with just 957 simple compounds that have been optimized for human health and consumption."
