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Buttigieg Proposes Separate Highway Lanes For Each Race

WASHINGTON, D.C.—Transportation Secretary Pete Buttigieg has proposed a novel plan for promoting equality in our nation's highways system, which literally has racism built into its DNA. His new plan promises to even things out for people of color by giving each race their own lane.

"Each race will be asked to stay in their lane," Buttigieg said. "The fastest lanes, of course, will go to the most oppressed races, who can't accomplish anything without the white man's help."

Lanes for persons of color will be luxurious wide lanes with no speed limits and no cops, since cops are racist. Lanes for white people will be packed with traffic and terribly maintained, so basically just what they are now in Democrat cities. In fact, Buttigieg says, any roads for white people that are currently in good condition will have cracks, potholes, and other imperfections added to them to ensure equality across the board.

"Everyone will have equal roads," Buttigieg said. "But some are more equal than others -- separate but equal."

At publishing time, Buttigieg had confirmed there would be a special lane for the unvaccinated as well.

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🎙Christianity, Star Wars Prequels, and Staying In California | The Dave Rubin Interview

Kyle and Ethan talk to Dave Rubin about identifying as a conservative, California, and Christianity. Dave has written a new book titled Don’t Burn This Book available wherever you find books

The 🐝 Podcast is also available on all podcast platforms.

00:50:59
February 19, 2025

Barron Tries To Blend In On Campus By Putting His Knees In His Shoes And Walking Around Like A Normal-Height Person

"I just want to be treated like any other 7-foot son of a billionaire president," said Barron to reporters. "Everywhere I go, I hear: 'Who is that giant person?' or 'Hey look! It's the heir to the throne of the American Empire, may he live forever!' or 'REEEEEEEEE!' It's really exhausting."

https://babylonbee.com/news/barron-tries-to-blend-in-on-campus-by-putting-his-knees-in-his-shoes-and-walking-around-like-a-normal-height-person

February 19, 2025

Healthy Vegan Food Carefully Constructed In Laboratory Using 957 Chemicals

"You have got to get rid of all the bad stuff, like the meat and the animal products," said lab technician Luka Ranier, pouring a beaker of methylphenylketone into a bubbling broth of 2,2-dimethylpropyl benzoyletate as part of the standard process of making a meatless burger. "We manage to get our job done here with just 957 simple compounds that have been optimized for human health and consumption."

https://babylonbee.com/news/healthy-vegan-food-carefully-constructed-in-laboratory-using-957-chemicals

February 19, 2025

Congress Warns Trump's Attempts To End War In Ukraine Could Result In End Of War In Ukraine

"If Trump ends the war in Ukraine, then the war in Ukraine will stop," warned House Minority Leader Hakeem Jeffries. "Trump is clearly not thinking about all the terrible things that will happen to us if the war in Ukraine ends."

https://babylonbee.com/news/congress-warns-trumps-attempts-to-end-war-in-ukraine-could-result-in-end-of-war-in-ukraine

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