U.S.—To promote more travel as COVID restrictions begin to lift, Airlines such as Delta, United, and Frontier are now offering free trips to Minneapolis for anyone who uses code "ANTIFA" at check-out.
"This is simply a standard promotion and is in no way related to the trial of evil murderer Derek Chauvin, who should be convicted unless Minneapolis wants to burn to the ground," said Delta CEO Ed Bastian. "We just want to promote tourism to the city of Minneapolis, which is just beautiful this time of year."
When pressed about the promotional code "ANTIFA", he responded: "It just stands for anti-fascist. Not sure why you would have a problem with being anti-fascist. What are you, a Nazi?"
In addition to the promotional code, United Airlines announced they would waive all security screenings for checked baggage if it should be found to contain innocent traveling items such as bricks, cans of soup, and Molotov cocktails.
After being questioned by some about this policy change, United CEO Scott Kirby responded, saying: "There's literally nothing suspicious about people wanting to travel to Minneapolis with a backpack full of bricks and soup cans. Maybe they're heading there to build a soup kitchen! Any suggestion otherwise is a conspiracy theory."
Airlines will also offer free return-trip cancellation should any passengers need to wait for Kamala Harris to bail them out of jail.
Kyle and Ethan talk to Dave Rubin about identifying as a conservative, California, and Christianity. Dave has written a new book titled Don’t Burn This Book available wherever you find books
The 🐝 Podcast is also available on all podcast platforms.
Barron Tries To Blend In On Campus By Putting His Knees In His Shoes And Walking Around Like A Normal-Height Person
"I just want to be treated like any other 7-foot son of a billionaire president," said Barron to reporters. "Everywhere I go, I hear: 'Who is that giant person?' or 'Hey look! It's the heir to the throne of the American Empire, may he live forever!' or 'REEEEEEEEE!' It's really exhausting."
Healthy Vegan Food Carefully Constructed In Laboratory Using 957 Chemicals
"You have got to get rid of all the bad stuff, like the meat and the animal products," said lab technician Luka Ranier, pouring a beaker of methylphenylketone into a bubbling broth of 2,2-dimethylpropyl benzoyletate as part of the standard process of making a meatless burger. "We manage to get our job done here with just 957 simple compounds that have been optimized for human health and consumption."
Congress Warns Trump's Attempts To End War In Ukraine Could Result In End Of War In Ukraine
"If Trump ends the war in Ukraine, then the war in Ukraine will stop," warned House Minority Leader Hakeem Jeffries. "Trump is clearly not thinking about all the terrible things that will happen to us if the war in Ukraine ends."
