Can God hear your prayers? After all, he's really busy and there's a ton of atmospheric interference in the way. Here are 8 proven techniques to ensure God will hear your prayers!
Say "Father God" at least 328 times: This is just basic prayer vocabulary. Make sure and get this right when you pray. Also, make sure to say the word "just" at the beginning and end of every sentence.
Actually pray: Guess we should have started with this one. If you want God to hear your prayers, you actually have to pray, so don't forget to do that.
Set the mood by hiring some Gregorian monks to chant in the background: If you can't afford that, the Halo: Combat Evolved soundtrack works too.
Sprinkle in some hot gossip to make your prayer more interesting: Most prayers are essentially gossip anyway, so this shouldn't be a problem.
Lock yourself in a closet where you can't hear your kids asking for breakfast: If they persist just lock them in the basement for a while. They'll be fine.
Make sure you're wearing a novelty Christian T-Shirt: Can't hurt.
Go inside a Hobby Lobby so the Devil can't enter and distract you: Hobby Lobby is the only place on earth where the Devil has never set foot.
Reluctantly mumble "but your will be done, and not mine" at the end: Just to make sure you're covered.
Finally end that bad boy with an "amen, and awoman," and you have a prayer that is sure to be answered! You're welcome!
Kyle and Ethan talk to Dave Rubin about identifying as a conservative, California, and Christianity. Dave has written a new book titled Don’t Burn This Book available wherever you find books
The 🐝 Podcast is also available on all podcast platforms.
State and local officials rush to create a catalog of minors to hand over to those on the Epstein client list.
"We want to protect the children" This new bill (Illinois SB 3977) is very similar to the recently passed California bill (and the introduced Colorado bill) and, if passed, would set a deadline of January 1st, 2028 for compliance.
https://legiscan.com/IL/bill/SB3977/2025
Barron Tries To Blend In On Campus By Putting His Knees In His Shoes And Walking Around Like A Normal-Height Person
"I just want to be treated like any other 7-foot son of a billionaire president," said Barron to reporters. "Everywhere I go, I hear: 'Who is that giant person?' or 'Hey look! It's the heir to the throne of the American Empire, may he live forever!' or 'REEEEEEEEE!' It's really exhausting."
Healthy Vegan Food Carefully Constructed In Laboratory Using 957 Chemicals
"You have got to get rid of all the bad stuff, like the meat and the animal products," said lab technician Luka Ranier, pouring a beaker of methylphenylketone into a bubbling broth of 2,2-dimethylpropyl benzoyletate as part of the standard process of making a meatless burger. "We manage to get our job done here with just 957 simple compounds that have been optimized for human health and consumption."
