The Babylon Bee
Culture • News • Comedy
Fake news you can trust.
Interested? Want to learn more about the community?

Learn more first
Oscars Delayed To Clear Out Massive Tent City On Red Carpet

LOS ANGELES, CA—The 2021 Oscars ceremonies have been delayed after local authorities were forced to clear out a large tent city that had sprung up at Union Station overnight.

"Ew! Get them away from me! Get them away!" shrieked a terrified Gwyneth Paltrow as local cops doused the camp with a large aerosol can of "Hobo-B-Gone" spray. More cops soon arrived with tactical gear and machine guns to remove the unwanted blight from the presence of Hollywood royalty.

The event was further delayed after award presenters Joaquin Phoenix and Sean Penn were mistaken for hobos and hauled off to prison.

"We are so sorry for this unfortunate delay," said Governor Gavin Newsom to the one reporter who is still attending his press conferences. "We are looking for a holding area for all these smelly hobos so the event can continue undisturbed."

More confusion ensued, however, after it was discovered that most of the tent city inhabitants were Oscar nominees who can no longer afford to live in LA.

post photo preview
Interested? Want to learn more about the community?

Learn more first
What else you may like…
Videos
Posts
🎙Christianity, Star Wars Prequels, and Staying In California | The Dave Rubin Interview

Kyle and Ethan talk to Dave Rubin about identifying as a conservative, California, and Christianity. Dave has written a new book titled Don’t Burn This Book available wherever you find books

The 🐝 Podcast is also available on all podcast platforms.

00:50:59
9 hours ago

UFO Files Reveal Aliens Here And Already Defrauded Minnesota For $20 Billion

"They're here among us," alien specialist Donny Marcus told the press. "I've been studying these beings for years — they're smart, and they're resourceful. It took no time at all for them to defraud Tim Walz's government of billions through Medicare and Medicaid fraud. The government didn't even ask why they needed the money; they just forked it over. The invasion people have been anticipating has been happening right under our noses all along."

https://babylonbee.com/news/ufo-files-reveal-aliens-here-and-already-defrauded-minnesota-for-20-billion

9 hours ago

Democrat Effort To Retake Congress Once Again Thwarted By Existence Of Laws

"The Democratic Party would be winning in a landslide if it weren't for that confounded Constitution," said House Minority Leader Hakeem Jeffries. "We have so many great ideas on how to win, but people keep saying things like 'Hey, that's illegal' or 'That's literally a crime.' It's becoming disheartening."

https://babylonbee.com/news/democrat-effort-to-retake-congress-once-again-thwarted-by-existence-of-laws

10 hours ago

Virginia Considering New Measure That Just Makes It Illegal For Republicans To Vote

"This is way easier," said Democratic Governor Abigail Spanberger. "We're tackling the real issue, which is Republicans being allowed to vote at all. There will be no more campaigning, no more counting ballots. That stuff is such a hassle anyway."

https://babylonbee.com/news/virginia-considering-new-measure-that-just-makes-it-illegal-for-republicans-to-vote

Available on mobile and TV devices
google store google store app store app store
google store google store app tv store app tv store amazon store amazon store roku store roku store
Powered by Locals