The Babylon Bee
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Report: Every Single Toy Gifted On Christmas Is Now Broken
According to the report, there is no one-size-fits-all explanation for the broken gifts. Toys were reported broken for nearly every reason imaginable ranging from rough play to unseen malevolent forces. The phenomenon, the report notes, is worldwide. Even children in remote Amazon tribes are reporting broken sticks.https://babylonbee.com/news/report-finds-every-single-toy-gifted-on-christmas-is-now-broken
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🎙Christianity, Star Wars Prequels, and Staying In California | The Dave Rubin Interview
Kyle and Ethan talk to Dave Rubin about identifying as a conservative, California, and Christianity. Dave has written a new book titled Don’t Burn This Book available wherever you find books
The 🐝 Podcast is also available on all podcast platforms.
00:50:59
Liberal White Woman Really Hoping A Black Shows Up To Her Kwanzaa Party This Year
With no black people to guide her, Armstrongs previous Kwanzaa parties have consisted of about seven white liberal women lighting candles, reading passages from Maya Angelou, and eating sweet potato pie. "It is like pumpkin pie, but for blacks," explained Armstrong. "It makes me feel so much solidarity with black people. I wish one of them were here for me to tell them."
Aw, Crap: DOGE Announces It’s Replacing Baseball With Cricket
Though many Americans expressed resistance to the idea, Ramaswamy assured the nation it would come to love cricket once it understood the rules. "It is really quite simple," explained Ramaswamy. "You just throw the whicky-whopper at the wicket wands, aiming a beamer at the block hole, and the walloper hits the boot hill and runs the bowling box for half a point if no one donkey drops the nibble. Of course, it is an extra three fourths of a point if the slingy bowls a paddle scoop, and the game keeps going until a nipbacker nets a gully grubber."https://babylonbee.com/news/aw-crap-doge-announces-its-replacing-baseball-with-cricket
Trump Announces Anyone Who Drinks Tea Instead Of Coffee Will Be Arrested On Suspicion Of Being A British Spy
"Trump is bringing shades of McCarthyism back to America, only instead of a red scare it is a blue scare as he encourages people to run and hide from the British," said outraged media pundit Fredrick Port. "I am not going to stop drinking my cup Earl Grey in the mornings." Unconfirmed reports indicate he was detained for questioning shortly after the live broadcast.
