MIDDLE EAST—The United States has long been buying weapons for both sides of various conflicts in the Middle East. But now, with multiple financial crises going on at home, the U.S. is looking for ways to reduce the cost of these conflicts. Finally, they landed on a solution: they'll cut out the middleman -- defense contractors -- and just have the countries lob giant sacks of American tax dollars at each other directly.
"Instead of going through the whole rigamarole of buying weapons for them, or letting them buy weapons from us at a discount, or supplying insurgent groups with weapons -- which is all very exhausting -- we'll just hand them a catapult and a bunch of money and let them go to town," said one American general. "It's much more efficient and cost-effective. Plus, we now have to spend less rebuilding the countries we just spent trillions blowing up. Since, you know, the sacks of dollars just kind of land with a thud. They can hurt if they hit you right on the head, but that's hard to do."
Israel quickly invented a "Green Dome" -- paid for with American tax dollars -- that will intercept the bags of money launched at them from Palestine and throw them right back. However, they later admitted the state-of-the-art defense system was just a bunch of trampolines lined up along the border.
Kyle and Ethan talk to Dave Rubin about identifying as a conservative, California, and Christianity. Dave has written a new book titled Don’t Burn This Book available wherever you find books
The 🐝 Podcast is also available on all podcast platforms.
State and local officials rush to create a catalog of minors to hand over to those on the Epstein client list.
"We want to protect the children" This new bill (Illinois SB 3977) is very similar to the recently passed California bill (and the introduced Colorado bill) and, if passed, would set a deadline of January 1st, 2028 for compliance.
https://legiscan.com/IL/bill/SB3977/2025
Barron Tries To Blend In On Campus By Putting His Knees In His Shoes And Walking Around Like A Normal-Height Person
"I just want to be treated like any other 7-foot son of a billionaire president," said Barron to reporters. "Everywhere I go, I hear: 'Who is that giant person?' or 'Hey look! It's the heir to the throne of the American Empire, may he live forever!' or 'REEEEEEEEE!' It's really exhausting."
Healthy Vegan Food Carefully Constructed In Laboratory Using 957 Chemicals
"You have got to get rid of all the bad stuff, like the meat and the animal products," said lab technician Luka Ranier, pouring a beaker of methylphenylketone into a bubbling broth of 2,2-dimethylpropyl benzoyletate as part of the standard process of making a meatless burger. "We manage to get our job done here with just 957 simple compounds that have been optimized for human health and consumption."
